This past Sunday, our pastor talked about the importance of simplification and how less can be more. My head nodded in agreement as he discussed simplifying priorities, commitments, schedules, and possessions. My marriage started with me wanting more and now, nine years and two kids later, I regret many of my early materialistic tendencies. More and more I am learning to simplify my life. You should see how my shoe collection has thinned out! I went from having many pairs of inexpensive shoes to a few pairs of still inexpensive and two pairs of moderately priced footwear. And just yesterday, Dr. N and I were saying that we should just get Z-man one or two pair of PediPed shoes, keep his crocs for the pool and throw out the rest.
But as far as simplifying my life, I am getting there. Clutter still surrounds me. But one area of simplification in which I’ve made great improvements is in simplifying our schedules and that’s what I’d like to share with you today for this edition of What Works for Me Wednesday.
When the X-Factor was just 18-months old, our schedules were crammed. We had at least one activity planned every day of the week in addition to grocery shopping, running errands and other daily chores. I’m a go-getter. A woman of action, so I thought that becoming a mommy of action would be a piece of cake. It was more like cake left in the oven 30 minutes too long. Once, after leaving story time in a rush to get to a playdate on the other side of town, the X-Factor threw her little body on the blacktopped parking lot, kicking, screaming and rolling in order to avoid getting strapped into her car seat. We were over doing life and needed to slow down. Here’s what I did (Please keep in mind, this didn’t happen overnight, it took me some time to change).
List my Priorities – Time with God, my family, and my friends are numbers 1 through 3 on my list of priorities and number 4 is to use my writing to glorify God. I realize that I need to keep them as such. And then I need to prioritize the time I would spend with my family, such as, education, playtime, etc.
Learn to Enjoy Time At Home – I’m a city girl. I like to be out and about. When we lived in Washington, D.C., I enjoyed nothing more than hopping on the metro and heading to the museums. But little growing bodies need more rest and down time. So I am working on creating time in our home life that is fun and relaxing and educational as well.
Only Add Commitments that will Add Light to Relationships – While I was rushing from playgroup to playgroup, I was spending very little quality time with my daughter or my friends. I was often too distracted and tired to fully enjoy adult conversations. Plus by the end of the day, I was irritable and my husband got the worst of me. So I decided that I would make sure that our commitments would enhance our relationships. For me, these include X-Factor’s non-competitive gymnastic classes, MOPS, Church, and Bible Studies. Those are our solid obligations and then each week I schedule something special, like a playdate, library time, etc., but I make sure that we don’t have every day full to the brim.
Pray before Adding Commitments - There are so many great activities and ministries to join. Often I am asked to be on planning committees and leadership teams and I use to say yes to each and every request. No, I don’t make any commitment decisions without first spending time in prayer.
Learn to Say No – Though its monosybolic, it’s the most difficult word to say. I can spout out supercalifragilisticexpealadocious faster than I can tell someone no. But trust me, it is a very important word to say. Once my priorities were strait, I was able to learn how to say no without feeling guilt.
I hope those tips are helpful to you. For more great tips, see Shannon at Rocks in My Dyer.
5 comments:
Knowing how to say no is so important!
What great ideas! I'm going through the book Boundaries with some friends and we'll be talking lots about overcommitting and things like that. I'm looking forward to learning alot from it. Thanks for sharing! Come on by Wani’s World sometime!
You are correct - no - is the hardest word to say. I too have learned to prioritize my extra activities.
Great post!
being a pastor's wife, I have had to learn to say no or I would be committed up to my eye balls! However, my husband has also taught me that if I want to "add" something to my schedule, I must first "delete" something...it works!
'no' really can be the hardest thing to say to others!
:)
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